The “N-Word”

N***er. Negro. The n-word. Oh, how I loathe it. How I mother-freaking hate, hate, hate, hate, hate that word! In my experience, it comes in four main forms: whites using it toward blacks, blacks to whites, blacks to blacks, and whites to whites.

The first is the one you hear about the most (because it was the one used the most throughout history). The third, in history, has more to do with the word “Negro” being interchangeable with “black”. (I’m not sure if this applied to “n***er”, but there you go)

But the second, third, and fourth (as used today) are the ones that disturb me the most, and here are the reasons why:

Blacks to whites: It happens the least, but it’s backward, and when I hear a black person (usually a teenage boy) use this, I think, “Do you really want to be as bad as the whites ‘back then’? Really?” Because that’s what’s happening! They’re taking a word that was used against us so many times it’s impossible to keep count, and this person’s slinging it around like they think, “Oh, they did it, so now it’s okay for me!” That’s what a five year-old kid does! It’s just irritating.

Blacks to Blacks: This one just infuriates me. Do the black people that use this word even know what it means, or are they just willfully being ignorant? If you don’t, I’ll tell you: It means “you’re inferior”. It means “I can do whatever I want to you, and no one will care.” It means “You’re nothing. You’re no one.” It’s something that’s been used toward blacks from all countries in the US for centuries, now. And now black people are willing to use that word on each other? That just shows how much we don’t listen.

Whites to Whites: I can’t tell which is worse, this one or the previous one. Unfortunately, this one actually seems plausible. Why? Because of our media. The n-word is common in rap (another thing that irritates me; rap is so popular, and could change things for so many people if it just spoke the right message), and whites wanting to conform to it (let’s just call them “wiggers“, for lack of a better word) think it’s just fine to use it because it’s all ancient history; they think that no one should care about that anymore, because everything is good between blacks and whites in America. Another (but slightly less believable)  reason is that some white parents could be teaching their children that the n-word is acceptable to use toward blacks. This wouldn’t be as plausible, though, because that Jim-Crow kind of racism isn’t acceptable in modern American society.

So what is the n-word? Something no one should use, but for some reason is still accepted by some. Is this the fault of blacks? Yes, to an extent; ignorance and racism seem to be the real issues.

Acting White

I was sitting in a desk studying, minding my own business, when the two (white) guys behind me started talking about “white girls who thought they were ‘black’ “. At first, I thought I’d misheard them, but there they were, laughing at the thought of those girls getting pregnant at the oh-so-funny age of four! It was enough to make my blood boil, but I just couldn’t say anything, too much of an introvert to speak up for my race. Finally, as they left, I plucked up the courage to ask one of the two if he thought I was a black person who thought I was white. Ironically, he stared at me as if I was crazy. Of course I wasn’t! “But I speak proper English and go to a good school! No black people do that, right?” What I was saying finally dawned on him, and he grew flustered. He started to say something, but gave up and left.

While I’m proud that I spoke up for myself and all the people those two had so unwittingly and unknowingly insulted (I really do think that they didn’t see anything wrong with what they were saying; how could they, when most likely no one’s ever called them out on it?), I’m now stuck with a thought that irks me: Is our society so messed up, so rife with stereotypes that being middle-class and speaking Standard English is what only whites can do? “Yes” has become my knee-jerk answer.